#47-Coping with Failure and Challenge

By Kathy Korman Frey

It’s been about a year since my last post in this series. Part of the reason has been: It’s been a tough year.

You know when you have those years, and December 31 rolls around and you are just so looking forward to the clean wipe of the previous year?

2011 to 2012 was like that for me. And carried over a little bit in 2012.

I was beginning to lose my power to press re-start when I remembered a story. It was inspired by a question from one of the attendees from #SisU2012 (the Hot Mommas Project Women’s Leadership Academy).

Tell us about a big failure, what happened, and how you recovered?

Read the rest of this post on our main blog, HERE.

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#43 You’re Cheap, I’m Lonely, Let’s Hang Out

By Kathy Korman Frey as part of the MDPT Series

Being a solopreneur can be lonely.  Today my day – and probably year – was brightened when my husband moved into my office. Well, officially he moved in last week, but today we made it look like a place that could be inhabited by humans.  Here he is:

He has fully outsourced every part of his business, and let go of his office space saving $18,000 a year. Nice honey! He’s launching another business basically teaching people how to run a million-dollar-plus business from one desk.  (He’ll be on CBS national radio on Friday…I’ll update with the link here if they stream). Because he is my husband, and we’re sort of heading toward this business/women’s education empire together, I have welcomed him into my home office: The Garage Mahal.

Loneliness and isolation is something women entrepreneurs deal with all the time. Maybe other entrepreneurs (e.g., “male,” “wookie”, etc.)  also feel isolated.  Here’s something I learned recently when prepping for a presentation to investor/advisors: According to the US Census

Read the rest of this post HERE

#42 Stress Solutions, Drag Queens, and Putting Fun Back in Business – Building a Million Dollar Business Part Time

By Kathy Korman Frey

Today I watched performers from RuPaul’s “Drag Race” show on a reality show “The Arrangement” which is about floral designers.  It’s basically Project Runway meets flowers.  You know what struck me, in addition to how gorgeous these drag queens were: They were having FUN. (Please note, blue dress is Gigi Levangie Grazer – a noted screenwriter and author who hosts the show).

So here’s what drag queens have to do with me: I realize I’m not having  fun anymore with my business.

Read rest of this post HERE

 

#34 How Entrepreneurs Deal With Failure

Today, I admit failure. I’ve been trying and trying to get this teleclass thing right. My research project  – the Hot Mommas Project – is now the world’s largest women’s case study library. Where to go from here? “You need to capture and package the knowledge you have from the Hot Mommas Project and your class at GW,” people tell me. Amy Millman of Springboard has suggested an Omni Media model (we can all dream….and Amy dreams BIG!).

Here is the tricky part: How to reconcile THINKING BIG with FEAR OF FAILURE.  As a former inhabitant of the fear-of-failure MSA, I invite you to read the over-achiever’s rules for failure, and the surprising benefits, mixed in with my lessons from interviewing thousands of business folk over the years.

The preface to falling on one’s face.

So, people have a couple of reactions to fear of failure. One is the white-knuckle grip:

The white knucklers: “I’m not going to let this sucker go and will fix this through force of will!”

The other reaction to failure is complacency:

The complacents: “Eh..who cares? That’s boring. Yada yada.”

Which are you? I am a varsity white-knuckler.  I have to carefully choose when and where I inject this temporary psychosis.  Good use of  white-knuckling psychosis: Getting into business school. Bad use of white-knuckling psychosis: Giving everything equal weight and drowning in your convictions. In my white knuckling hey-day, when I was applying to business school…for the second time…and getting my second round of recommendation letters, after taking the GMATS for the third time, I read the following on the letter in my application:

“Has a difficult time accepting failure.”

I remember thinking, “Oh, he’s just trying to come up with one of those negative/positive comments that the admissions committee will secretly like.”  But, all these years later, I actually wonder.

Is there a benefit to experiencing and working through failure?

And, is it an executive-level skill we should help the next generation to acquire? As an entrepreneur and educator who now realizes the benefit of experience -and the failure that MUST accompany that experience – I believe the answer is “yes.”  YES – failure is something we must experience, and be able to deal with. In the past, I viewed failure as a defeat. Now, I view it as an inevitable occurence from time to time. The real question is: What does one actually DO with failure once you encounter it.

1. Practice failing.

Yes, this sounds weird.  Start small. Little failures hurt less.  You may already be ahead of the game! Have you ever screwed up on a test? Made a social blunder? Gotten your TPS report in late?  Bad news: The “cringe” moment stinks. Good news: You’re trying things, which brings experience.

Action Item: In the left of three columns on a piece of paper, RECORD some of the small failures.

My example: As I complained about earlier, I put together a teleclass for women on mentoring. I thought “this will be the greatest thing since sliced bread!” I tweeted. People re-retweeted. For WEEKS. One person signed up.

2. Learn from the failure.

Every time you fail is an opportunity to learn. In addition to sounding like a really annoying thing your grandparents would tell you, this also happens to be true.

Action Item: In the middle column, write what you have learned from the failure.

My example: Momma-hood. I have never felt my learning curve and self-confidence increase so quickly as when I had kids. It DWARFS any business learnings in my life. How is that possible?  I am always messing stuff up, forgetting things, yelling when I say I won’t yell. But, I think I am a good mom. How is this possible? That one can royally screw stuff up AND be really good at their job?

Two things:

1. You just can. Literally no one is perfect…except George Clooney.

2. The more we TRY, the more we may FAIL, but the more we LEARN, which makes us BETTER. This process – with some successes and supporters mixed in – is what provides the life experience to weather the storm. If you’re driving a TANK of self-confidence and experience, a pebble will make a little ding. If you’re driving the Razor Scooter of self-confidence and experience, the pebble will pack more of a wallop.

If you’re driving a TANK of self-confidence and experience, a pebble will make a little ding. If you’re driving the Razor Scooter of self-confidence and experience, the pebble will pack more of a wallop.

My example part deux: Mommahood meets teleclass. When no one signed up for my teleclass, I first thought, “People don’t get it.” But, the truth is – it’s me who doesn’t get it. I go through this cycle of problem identification, frustration, and solution MUCH more quickly now. I have to. I’m a mom. I am JUST LIKE the momma rat described in this study at University of Richmond by Dr. Craig Kinsley:

“Upon becoming a mother, a female rat’s learning, memory, time management and efficiency improve.”

So, now, instead of dying a little death because something is wrong with the teleclass,  I think of it as a fun intellectual puzzle to figure out.

Skip this to avoid gory strategy detail (My thoughts on the problem with the telecalss):

  • I think it could be the title. My hypothesis is that the term “mentor” is too much like “will you marry me” after the first date. I need to start with a more junior varsity term.
  • The cost and time – I have a hard time believing it’s the cost, which is $99.  But, that could be a barrier. Also, two or three hours is a bit much for someone who has no idea who I am.

3. The Bounce Back.

There are parables about “fall down seven times, get up eight.”  That is LITERALLY what it’s all about in business and life. On example is students during the semester. When they fall behind, these students need to:

a. Admit it (to themselves).

b. Admit it (to me).

c. Make a plan to turn it around.

d. Execute the plan.

These steps are actually VERY HARD. Even more difficult, one might argue, than the messing up part.

Action item: In the third column, note the application of your learning. For instance, did you change the way you did TPS reports so you could get them in on time? My guess is that if there is no successful application of your learning (Step 2), you have NOT completed the process. Most need to go through Steps A through D.

“When you don’t learn your lesson, the universe brings it back to you.”

Marlene Elias

My example:

a. Admit it (to themselves). I know this teleclass is a dud, at least the marketing of it. The content is solid.

b. Admit it (to other stakeholders / involved parties). Well, there is only one other involved party at this point – the one student who needs to be refunded. However, taking this example broader – in an office setting there is nothing I love more than hearing “I screwed up, and here’s how I’m going to fix it.” It just makes me beam with pride. This person is demonstrating executive level critical thinking skills, putting the organization about themselves, and being solutions oriented! Brilliant! Achin (our Learning Community Manager) does this all of the time. It’s one of the reasons he is so excellent. You can’t be excellent if you can’t understand what success is, and how you are measuring up.

You can’t be excellent if you can’t understand what success is, and how you are measuring up.

c. Make a plan to turn it around. I will play with the teleclass verbiage going forward and see what kind of response I get. I think , again, the term “mentor” is too much of a committment for people. I’ve can safely rule out time (3 hours) and money ($99), because I have massive groups of people investing way more time and money for several-week courses I run on Women’s Business Leadership.

d. Execute the plan. I actually do not plan to do this in the near-term. I plan to have this in “observe and learn” mode. I have some other priorities right now and feel I’ve already put this through one R&D cycle.

  • 5.26.10 – Okay, I totally lied. I spent the morning after this post re-working the tele-class. I lowered the commitment (to one hour) and the price (to “free”). The second major step was taking out the word “mentor,” and making a more interesting title. What are people REALLY going to get out of this? It’s MORE than a mentor. I made the title reflect that. I tried to – as Rosabeth Moss Kanter says – “grab them by the throat” right away (this was just a very impactful way of saying “non optional…get their attention”). People don’t have time to ferret out what the heck you’re talking about. In fact, you probably don’t have the time to read this. What are you doing? Get back to work! Click here to see the new seminar page.
  • Why do this? Don’t our business school professors teach us not to compete on price? (Unless you are employing the “cost leadership” position, which I’m not). Well, I am building a funnel. The funnel has to be wide. Making it a two- or three-hour commitment, and charging for it, creates to many barriers. So, I am seeing how this “broad and slim” approach goes.  I have no good analogy for this. Ice rink?

The results. It’s working.

  • New strategy for teleclass.  Number of Tweets = 2. Number of Registrants = 2.
  • Old strategy for teleclass. Number of Tweets (and Retweets) = 156. Number of Registrants = 1.

WORDS OF WARNING: Don’t be “too good” to fail.

Where your resume and experience can help you: A D&B report indicates that 96% of small business failure is attributable to managerial incompetence. So, your experience and education CAN help in that way.

Where your resume and experience can’t help you:You know those people who JUST CAN’T admit their plan stinks, or they are horrible at organizing? These may be the same people who have a hard time apologizing for things and – worse yet – try to make it your fault! Don’t feel bad. These people are condemned to a type of business and career purgatory. They will not advance because they cannot even get to part “a” of the bounce back plan: Admitting it.  This knuckle-dragging behavior will always come back to haunt someone in their career or personal life. Looking a challenge right in the face, even if you created that challenge, is the surest way to a true feeling of freedom and success.

Looking a challenge right in the face, even if you created that challenge, is the surest way to a true feeling of freedom and success.

PARTING THOUGHTS: At the end of the day you have to be a real person, saying what really happened, and working toward a solution, usually with other people. Otherwise you will be stunted from an emotional and a career standpoint. As I tell my students: It’s not about being right, it’s about making it better.

It’s not about being right, it’s about making it better.

What is the Hot Mommas Project?

The Hot Mommas Project is an award-winning venture housed at the George Washington University School of Business.  We make women’s stories teachable using our “case wizard” at www.HotMommasProject.org . The Hot Mommas Project library is the first of its kind, providing scalable, global access to role models and virtual mentors that can be used by educators, trainers, and parents. We’ve been featured in Prentice Hall textbooks, the Washington Post Magazine, NPR and are the winner of a national Coleman Foundation case award.

How you can get involved: Write your story, or nominate a dynamic woman 18 or older.

Our call for 2011 nominations has begun. While the contest runs through January 31, 2011 – Start now! There will be prizes this spring and fall for early bird publishers.

How it works: Nominated women come online, write their story using our “case wizard,” and click “publish” to be permanently archived in our case library.  Winners will be published in a leading Prentice Hall textbook in addition to other honors and prizes. To participate, nominate a dynamic woman 18 or older (yourself included) here or find us on Twitter. No, you do not need to be a mom. To inquire about sponsorship, email us.

#31 Are Entrepreneurs Really Crazy? Escaping: The Vortex.

Enter: THE VORTEX. (click here) Prior to the semi-calm and orderly exchange pasted below, I entered what I called “the vortex.” This means I was nuts.  The Hot Mommas Project process is based on nominating dynamic women over the age of 18 to act as role models through writing their stories. Thus, I nominated women, re-nominated women, sent reminder emails, got the team to send reminder emails…the list goes on. This was all because of my passion for my project (combined with an inability to accept failure and a kind of control-freakishness). It was a gravitational pull.

The VORTEX IS REAL. It turns out, that many entrepreneurs literally do suffer from a kind  “Hypomania.” Only, because it makes people money, we celebrate it and call it “drive” and “persistence.”

Below, I deconstruct the VORTEX and explain how I escaped it. This was yesterday, however.

1. The situation (no, not my abs) If this pop culture reference escapes you – click here. Last night at midnight the second annual Hot Mommas Project Case Study Competition came to an end. Today, we are playing clean up on some technical errors on the site.

What I want/deserve/should be doing: Watching Lady Gaga and Elton John’s Grammy performance as a reward for hitting nearly 200 case studies and – officially – being the world’s largest women’s case study database!

What I doing instead: Sending nerdy emails – like the following- because I am an obsessed entrepreneur. It’s a problem. Below, I not only address the current issue at hand, I start speculating about the future, the team that will get together, and roles. I’m thinking, “Can’t I just CHILL for ONE DAY?”

****

Cast of Characters: “Dave” – Dave Juth, our developer at FMS Inc. , “Achin”Achin Jain our Learning Community Manager (in India), “Luke” Luke Chung – owner of FMS Inc.

Dave,

THE WOMEN HAVE ROCKED IT OUT!!! Our second annual case study competition ended last night. We are almost up to 200 cases now and officially the world’s largest women’s case study library. I was wondering about using FMS’s site, again, for judging. Thoughts?  Here is what Achin says:

“It would be nice to see whether Dave would let us use FMS server again for judging. Tell him that I will send him the database file whenever we are done fixing the technical errors and ready to move to the judging phase. He will just have to do a copy and paste job.”

Tell me if I need to ask Luke about this. Overdue, anyway, to talk to him (see PS)

Kathy

P.s. For LATER, planting seeds:

I also now have a list of things we need to fix, update, etc. and need to have a conversation with Luke.

Looking ahead, I was wondering – also – about including in our meeting some social media guys as experts to say “this will work, this won’t, this will be better for SEO and communities and mobile apps” and yada yada. I need to figure out what is possible for Achin to do, and what FMS needs to do, as we move forward.

****

3. So, Are We REALLY CRAZY? Well in looking over this, I skipped #2, and am too lazy to go back and fix it. So, that’s not a great sign. A book by John Gartner on the topic of nutty entrepreneurs has the following quote:

Hypomania–a mild form of mania–drove many of America’s most famous leaders and entrepreneurs to succeed.

4. UH, OKAY, MAYBE THE VORTEX JUST = CRANKINESS. I read VCMike’s blog, I realize I bear almost NONE of the traits of hypomania. Here they are:

  • pressured speech; rapid talking
  • inflated self-esteem or grandiosity;
  • decreased need for sleep;
  • flight of ideas or the subjective experience that thoughts are racing;
  • easy distractibility and attention-deficit (superficially similar to attention deficit hyperactivity disorder);
  • increase in psychomotor agitation; and
  • involvement in pleasurable activities that may have a high potential for negative psycho-social or physical consequences (e.g., the person engages in unrestrained buying sprees, sexual indiscretions, or foolish business investments)

I do tend to have a racing mind. But, that’s about it. So, basically my nuttiness was not leading to a grandiose entrepreneurial success. It’ s just nuttiness.  Time to ESCAPE THE VORTEX.

5. ESCAPE THE VORTEX – To escape the racing thoughts and panic, I first tried to do what earth-beings call “Letting Go.” I envisioned everything turning out okay, and that my worrying was pointless. It didn’t work.

6. ESCAPE THE VORTEX – PART DEUX – So I was onto Part Deux. One realization is that I had failed to set up “shifts” between the team members in advance of the last week of the contest. It made me feel better to recognize this blunder, and plan more effectively for next year instead of fashioning voo-doo dolls and putting them on a shrine in the corner of my room and lighting three candles and…KIDDING!

7. ESCAPE THE VORTEX – PART THREE. Sealing the deal of “Escaping the Vortex” was MOVING ON. I mentally moved on from this year’s case study competition, and started thinking about next year’s. Who would be nominated? Would we do year-round training on case writing? What about early-bird submission prizes? Thinking about SOLUTIONS and moving on is what helped me fully exit the vortex…until this morning.

8. THIS IS YOUR LIFE. THIS IS YOUR LIFE ON CRAZY ENTREPRENEURSHIP. My kids did not in any way, shape or form agree to this last sentence. Yet, somehow I feel very frustrated when I am on my Blackberry needing to respond to case-writers about technical issues, and the munchkins claiming they are mine are relentless about wanting to play in the snow and watch Spongebob. Aha! In addition to having shifts for my staff and myself in next year’s case study competition, I definitely need to set up shifts for my FAMILY! For instance:

  • Example 1: If I had a staff member on a shift this morning, I handle the kids stress-free.  It would not be “battle of the Crackberry.”
  • Example 2: During the 11th hour of the competition, my husband was out of town and we had no sitter. And it snowed.  So, now I am getting my husband’s travel schedule for the ENTIRE YEAR so I can plan better next time.
  • I’m sure I’ll have some other brilliant realizations, but, now I am just tired from the Vortex’s G-Force.

9. DELEGATION & EXECUTIVE-LEVEL TOOLKIT BUILDING. This is really the key.

  • Lesson 1. Learning to manage and delegate – not just lead – is what I am growing here in my executive-level toolkit. My workplace is virtual and flexible. It requires a few more check-ins than a traditional office environment.
  • Lesson 2. Furthermore, when we entrepreneurs try to do it all ourselves, and then enter the VORTEX, that is when we feel bad, overwhelmed, unsuccessful.
  • Lesson 3. And, let’s be honest. Those close to us feel it right along with us. Escaping the VORTEX is not just a “nice to have,” it’s a “need to have.”

Conclusion: So, my belated New Year’s Resolution is to think and plan ahead as I never have before.

The goal: STAY OUT OF THE VORTEX.

10. FINAL ACT – TAMING THE VORTEX. In the final taming-of-the-vortex act, I WILL watch Lady Gaga’s Grammy performance. Heck! I may even watch Pink too!  And Beyonce! I am going to walk the Hot Mommas Project talk and realize that smart Hot Mommas know when they are using their powers for good, or using them for evil. And, the Vortex is EVIL! Time to exit, and focus on Grammy playbacks, reading over fabulous and inspiring cases that never cease to amaze me, and a night at home with my little munchkins while daddy is at a Wizards game.

What are your tools for escaping the “Entrepreneurial Vortex?”

***

What is the Hot Mommas Project?

The Hot Mommas Project is an award-winning venture housed at the George Washington University School of Business.  We make women’s stories teachable using our “case wizard” at www.HotMommasProject.org . The Hot Mommas Project library is the first of its kind, providing scalable, global access to role models and virtual mentors that can be used by educators, trainers, and parents. We’ve been featured in Prentice Hall textbooks, the Washington Post Magazine, NPR and are the winner of a national Coleman Foundation case award.

How you can get involved: Write your story, or nominate a dynamic woman 18 or older.

Our call for 2011 nominations has begun. While the contest runs through January 31, 2011 – Start now! There will be prizes this spring and fall for early bird publishers.

How it works: Nominated women come online, write their story using our “case wizard,” and click “publish” to be permanently archived in our case library.  Winners will be published in a leading Prentice Hall textbook in addition to other honors and prizes. To participate, nominate a dynamic woman 18 or older (yourself included) here or find us on Twitter. No, you do not need to be a mom.

#30 Would You Read This? My Book Outline for Women and The New Sisterhood of Success

It’s that time again. Time to stop messing around and throw down the gauntlet for myself, much as I did in the first post in March, 2008. At that time, I could not see what lay ahead. All I saw was fear, no money, and a bunch of to-do lists and ideas that never seemed to get done. Piece by piece – and while being incredibly cheap aka “resourceful” – I recruited help, enlisted partners, built the Hot Mommas Project story-telling software, and then…the clincher: THE WOMEN. Women came from everywhere…from Twitter…from HARO queries…from mail blasts…from blog posts….from media appearances…from the George Washington University School of Business newsletter! They showed up, ready to fight. They said:

“We are here to fight to make the next generation better, and more prepared, and self-confident. I am here to share what I have learned, good and bad, so that we may have options in life, instead of being told what our options are.”

They told their stories, and the ripple effect never stopped. Stay-at-home moms inspired corporate execs. Victims of abuse inspired start-up entrepreneurs.  Entrepreneurs who lost, and then found, their way inspired students. Cancer survivors inspired everyone. I didn’t grow up with sisters, but, I got over 100 sisters last year. These incredible women who told their stories to help the next generation, and each other, are my Everyday Revolutionaries.

But, I STILL remember that feeling…sitting there in my office, writing my first blog post, and not seeing ANY of that. It’s sort of how I feel now. I should be writing a book, I should be getting more nominations for the Hot Mommas Project 2010 case competition, I should, I should, I should. So, once again, I humbly turn to my invisible…yet not so invisble…audience. Here is my idea for my book. I have lots of people ready to run with this and help me when I finish my outline, which I never seem to be able to do. (Who is helping me? Aside from friends’ connections to book agents, I have to give MASSIVE shout outs to pitch and media experts Sam Horn, and Marc Silverstein).

Book concept/Title:

How to be a Hot Momma

The New Sisterhood of Success

Enduring message: Here is HOW to do it based on how Hot Mommas do it (life, career, etc.). Hear it straight from the mouths of your sisters, friends, mothers, and aunts…because we care. Oh, yeah, and we also want you to rule the world.

Why you should listen: This will be the Belly Laughs mixed with Four Hour Work Week of business/life books. Not only will this be immensely fun to read, and possibly contain some profanity depending on the author’s coffee levels and general level of crankiness, but – also – there are actual FACTS and HOW TOs based on:

  • The largest library of teachable role models in the world (they taught, we listened, and now we bring those lessons to you).
  • Cutting-edge, inside-look research detailing the practices of hundreds of driven AND happy women.
  • Highlights from the award-winning Women’s Entrepreneurial Leadership class at the George Washington University School of Business.

[This part makes me cringe, but, I’ve been told by my husband and others I need to go ahead and pimp myself out]

Author: It is I, your humble So-You-Think-You-Can-Dance-watching, kid-chasing, husband-raising, coffee-drinking author who also happens to have a Harvard MBA, teach college students, and have an illustrious career (entrepreneur and former corporate wheeler and dealer and nonprofit executive in the aging sector). In the “for what it’s worth” category I am a DC Twitter Elite, write for Maria Shriver Women’s Conference site, and have been dubbed “one of the nation’s top business bloggers” by HSM’s World Business Forum.  Bio link.

If you choose to believe the above, please read on … we’re almost to the good part.

The following has been said about “How to Be a Hot Momma” author, Kathy Korman Frey:

“You have something in your teeth.”

Oh, wait, wrong quote …this is it:

“Kathy is like a modern day guardian angel, without a God complex.  She navigates us through stories and helps women apply them to their own lives.”

Mysterious and Powerful Entertainment Industry Corporate Communications Executive

Now that I’ve paid the nice lady five, crisp, $100 dollar bills…here’s the outline:

Chapters:

Foreward…Hopefully by one of the Hot Mommas extremely impressive judges from 2009 or 2010.

Intro: Who is a Hot Momma? Hot Mommas think being perfect is boring.  Hot Mommas are entrepreneurs of life: Making their own rules, and finding their own way, and having the self-confidence to do that. And the number one trait of a Hot Momma that distinguishes her from all others? A Hot Momma helps her sisters. She learns, and doesn’t stop there; she pays it forward so that others may learn.

Major steps in becoming a Hot Momma (in the book, I plan to use Sam Horn’s IDEA framework: I = Idea, D = Detail, E = Example, A = Application).

1. Self confidence – First, a Hot Momma must believe she can do it. Tips for building life-long self-confidence are discussed in this section.

  • “Grey boxes” (fun stats) will include research showing the self-confidence differential between women and girls, and our male counterparts.
  • Resources: Examples of Hot Mommas who have been through the self-confidence building process, how they did it, and links to templates and tools.

2. Idea generation – A Hot Momma’s GPS is constantly on the lookout for the intersection of “Passion Ln.” and “Idea Ave.” When those two meet, BINGO. But, the Hot Momma also knows that the journey is part of the trip.

  • Grey boxes: Stats on idea creation, and neurological information on women.
  • Resources: Examples of Hot Mommas who have been through the idea generation process and how they did it. Mind Mapping, Opportunity Recognition, and Passion Inventory exercises used in GWSB’s award-winning Women’s Entrepreneurial Leadership class are included.

3. Okay, that was too many ideas – Focus, implementation – Sometimes, the brain of a Hot Momma is in overdrive. There can be ideas, then too many ideas. There can be to-dos, but then too many to dos. This chapter focuses on how to reign in the brain of the Hot Momma, and use its power for good…using…”The F Word” (FOCUS).

  • Grey Boxes: Stats from Hot Mommas Project mentor survey on traits for success, including focus.
  • Resources: Examples of “master focuser “(is that a word?) Hot Mommas, their tips and tricks, and a daily action-plan template.

4. Stocking the toolkit – Key tips for women only, communication, negotiation, and more. Did you know that women engage in certain behaviors (by accident) in communicating and negotiating with people, bosses, roommates, etc? This chapter deals with the most important things Hot Mommas try to improve on to get out there and take on the world.

  • Grey Boxes: Statistics on communication, negotiation, resulting salary differentials, and other key facts.
  • Resources: We draw from outside the Hot Mommas Project data pool for this section as most women don’t even KNOW they are engaging in these behaviors which impact their success.

5. Be a game changer – Hot Mommas are entrepreneurs because they have to be, they are miserable where they are, or they hear the distant call of “Passion Ln.” and “Idea Ave.” However they became entrepreneurial, Hot Mommas just ARE. At home, at work, in their communities. They take the pieces of the puzzle and don’t just put them together WELL, they put them together DIFFERENTLY.

  • Grey Boxes: The Hot Mommas Project literally created the data set on women as game changers. We reveal our previously unpublished data, and compare it to existing “traditional” data which shove women into traditional categories (part-time, full-time, etc.).
  • Resources: Case studies on game changers from the Hot Mommas Project survey and case library will be highlighted. Tools and templates on “how to be a game changer” will be included.

6. Balance – This is high on the radar screen of women and families everywhere.  We take on the concept of balance with three critical topics: Perspective, Organization, and Delegation.  Many women treat balance as if it is an end in and of itself.  The evolved Hot Momma treats balance as a MEANS to an end. Something to achieve, and move on, so that they can get onto number 7, back to number 3, or go rogue with some other activity like bathing. The topic of managing expectations (self, and others) is also addressed.

  • Grey Boxes: Former Harvard Business School Professor and Assistant Secretary of Commerce Dennis Hightower states: “A good manager can make decisions with between 40 and 70 percent information.”  We apply this statistic to balance, encouraging women make sure that achieving balance is a hurdle, not a brick wall. We validate womens’ concerns about balance by revealing data on dual income couples, and common responses and attitudes about balance from our Hot Mommas Project survey and previously unpublished “Balance Snapshot” database.
  • Resources: Tips from Hot Mommas Project “Master Balancers” – the top 10 percent of our survey-takers who are highly driven, and highly balanced both personally and professionally. If they can do it, we can do it.

7. Mentoring and support systems. Hot Mommas not only HAVE mentors, they ARE mentors. Hot Mommas have an internal call to action that leads them to pass on their learnings to others both formally (through the Hot Mommas Project and other outlets) and informally. They mentor, because they have been mentored. Hot Mommas have a large support network, and are more successful because of it.

  • Grey Boxes: Hot Mommas Project research on the hierarchy and scale of support networks will be shared.
  • Resources: A Five Minute Mentor template will be shared that can be used with mentees, mentors, and at work or at home. Did you know your whole family could serve as a mentor? Learn how in this chapter.

Thank you for reading. The last step is to fill out this poll (I’ll use it in my book proposal!). Thank you, again.

Want to get involved with the project? Go to www.HotMommasProject.org and NOMINATE a dynamic woman you know to share her story, and help the next generation. Winners of our annual case study competition will be published in a major Prentice Hall Textbook.  Here is our 2010 press release.

#29 Free Online Business Tools for Which I am Thankful – Building a Million Dollar Business Part Time

If you’re like me, then the holidays are the only time you have to dig out the neurons covered in dust that have been on sabbatical while you:

–         Herd cats

–         Deal with other mammals in your life

–         Follow your own grandiose visions

So, I am using this post to share some of my favorite “get your act together” tools I use for “dealing” on a daily basis. Keep in mind, I am a busy, quasi-stressed out mom, entrepreneur, and colossal nerd.

THINGS I USE TO DEAL ON A DAILY BASIS

  1. www.Mint.com – A free finance tool
  2. www.Doodle.com – Easy group scheduling tool (see “cat herding” above)
  3. www.GoogleDocs.com – I use an excel sheet in Google Docs to manage my team, some of whom are virtual. Love it.
  4. www.PollDaddy.com – Polls are a great. I really like them. The fact that they are free makes them even better. You can use Google Forms as well.
  5. www.EventBrite.com – This was introduced to me by the guys at iStrategyLabs. Use it for your real life events or virtual seminars. You will see why.
  6. 1888PressRelease.com – Good stuff. I always like things that give you reach you don’t deserve because you have no money. But, we can’t let that stop us!
  7. www.TwitterAnalyzer.com – Gives me good stats I can share with the guys in my department and let them know I’m not TOTALLY wasting time.
  8. www.SlimTimer.com – It’s like you’re back in high school with your mom telling you to get your homework done. Love it.
  9. Six O’Clock Scramble – Healthy meals in 30 minutes. I’m sure I would use this if I cooked. Okay, also, this is not business. But, you gotta cook, right? And if you spend 30 less minutes on cooking, then that’s 30 more minutes for your business.
  10. www.FitDay.com – While we’re on the health topic, my favorite free health tool. Most entrepreneurs I know in EO (Entrepreneurs Oranization where you’re under 40 and have sales of $1 million or more) have some major hobby, including working out, etc.

What tools are you thankful for (more like the above, and less like – uh – a jack hammer). Or, as my aunt and dad and other erudite folks might correct me, “For what tools are you thankful?”

 

THINGS THAT ARE HIGHLY ANNOYING.

I have just read this blog, and am feeling quite snarky now. I am less thankful for the following:

  • Trump Network on Twitter– How did Trump let this happen to his name?
  • The “make cash at home” people
  • The “make money on Google” people
  • The “you can earn money on Twitter” people
  • When I am looking for a document on my computer and click through like six windows, and then do that every time I need to find a document, several times a day, for years.

IF YOU DON’T LAUGH, YOU’LL CRY

It is important to laugh, because if you don’t laugh you’ll cry. Here are some of my favorite sites right now. These are only for people with sick senses of humor. If you are “normal,” don’t bother.

  1. @darthvader – That’s right, you heard me.
  2. Does this Blog Make Us Look Fat?
  3. The Bloggess
  4. The Onion

Have a Happy Thanksgiving everyone, and don’t forget to nominate the dynamic women in your life (over 18) as a role model for the Hot Mommas Project 2010 case competition. We make everyday women’s stories teachable to help the next generation. Email us with your nomination including name, contact, and reason for nomination.

Related links:

Why Mentoring Matters for Girls and Women – and How to Be Part of the Solution

My Interview on Washington Business Tonight on “Hibernating for Business” (Windows Media Player Needed)